This Is Now by Leah Atwood

Widowed for nearly a year, Janie Stroud is lost. All she can do is take each day as it comes. Every smile, each peel of laughter, the rare days without tears—all give her hope of one day finding a new normal, whatever that may be. Can normal even exist for a twenty-five-year-old widow?

After a tragic helicopter crash claims Mike Stroud’s life in the final weeks of a deployment, Evan Jergens takes seriously his vow to look after Janie, Mike’s widow. He considers her a second sister, and he’d do all he could to make her life better in the aftermath of Mike’s death.

Over time, their feelings shift from friendship to something more, but neither wants to love. Evan sees himself as a cripple with little to offer as a husband and is eaten by guilt for falling in love with his best friend’s widow. Janie’s afraid to love again and set herself up for the risks that come with it.

What will it take to break through their barriers and live in the present?