Simply Crazy by Jenn Hype

Forget apps, websites and singles events – clearly the best way to meet a guy is to move in next door, accidentally assault him and then demand a job at his company.

If that kind of charm doesn’t totally knock him off his feet, the next step is to build an army. If possible, try to recruit those closest to the target, such as his mom, sisters and closest friends. Sure, it sounds extreme and maybe a little bit crazy, but I’ve always subscribed to the old adage “No one worth having comes willingly.” Okay, I switched out some words there, but you get the point.

Caution: Even the most foolproof plans can have hiccups along the way. I’ve taken the liberty of compiling a list of things you should watch out for: Crazy ex-boyfriends who pop up out of nowhere like an evil jack-in-the box; Women who think a strategic nip slip is effective at landing a boyfriend; Co-workers who think it’s hilarious to prank you at work and then upload the videos to social media.

Still have doubts? No worries. I’ll show you how it’s done.