Hot Mess Love by Aria Hawthorne

He used to be my hot British crush du jour. Then, he unexpectedly became my archenemy billionaire boss. Now I’m a total hot mess because I might just be falling in love. Okay, it’s true. I am totally the thirstiest single girl in all of Chicago for wanting to drink those dimples right off his beautiful, Euro-chiseled face the moment he walks up to my candy counter and says, “Cheers” with his posh British accent and deliciously devilish smirk. #EarlofStudlandia

He’s offering me one unforgettable night in his penthouse hotel suite and I’m the kind of habitual hot mess who’s willing to accept it, if I wasn’t already overcommitted. #MistressofMisbehavin

You see, I’ve been suckered into accepting this crazy second job. Despite the fact that I’ve never held a respectable, responsible job for more than a month in my life, I’m now the social media director of my favorite online store selling intimate accessories for single girls like me who don’t want to wait around for Prince Charming to magically swipe right, just so I can experience my nightly Oh’s. #MyPleasureChest #MyFemaleEmpowerment

But there’s just one problem–the company’s old crotchety chief investor, who I’ve never met, is determined to force the business into bankruptcy, and the only way I can keep it afloat–and my new job as its Director of Comebacks in play–is if I can convince my newest nemesis, Mr. Kit Crusty Balls, that I can turnaround his failing company faster than its JackRabbits can make me say, Ooh-ooh-ooh-OOH-LA-LA-LAAAAaaaaaaa.

And hopefully, whenever he returns to Chicago, Earl of Studlandia and I will finally have our royally raunchy romp, despite the fact that our impromptu texting affair and unexpected emotional connection might be softening my noncommittal Snarky Brat heart into the fantasy of something more than just one night of whoreplay. After all, I’m now the respectable, responsible social media director. Maybe it’s time for an international man candy of mystery to persuade me to find love within my own pleasure chest. #OnlyFoolsFallinLove #FirstTimeFanGirlofFoolishness