Embers by Yolanda Olson

I swore to myself that I would never love you.
I promised my children that they wouldn’t suffer for my sins.
But it’s so hard, Daddy.
It’s hard to not love the man that gave me life. It’s hard to not love the man that’s taken care of me the only way he knows how.
I know it’s not your fault, and maybe one day, I’ll find out why you became a monster. While we still have time left together, I want you to know that I forgive you for everything you’ve done. I want you to know that I do love you, even if not in the way you would have hoped for.
It’s almost over, Daddy.
Close your eyes and go to sleep; I’ll be here with you, holding your hand and letting you know that everything will be alright. Because it will be, won’t it? That’s the promise that you made to me—that no matter what happens between us, everything will always turn out okay.
I know you don’t care much for anything you can’t control, but sometimes life folds its cards and we have to go when it’s our time.
Please stop fighting it, Daddy.
It hurts me to see you suffering so much. I’ve done my best to take care of you, but it’s time to go. Hurry along and know that we’ll be behind you shortly because I can’t live in a world that doesn’t have you in it.
I love you, Daddy.